Saturday, November 29, 2008

Drills Before Coffee? Srsly?

One holiday tradition I could do without: the annual reinstallation. The ‘rents don’t only buy big stuff but that mostly what they hang downstairs to “showcase.” They have a lot of parties for the holidays and so everything gets moved around.

There’s a ginormous Brice Marden in the foyer that gets put in storage so we have a place for a tree. They put up a big crow instead. I think it’s creepy but Mom likes the “nature theme.” I get it, but this evil creature looks like she’s going for your eyes! Like Christmas with Tippi Hedren.

Anyway, things get moved around and some holiday art comes out of hiding and that’s all good. Except that it takes all day to do and so the art handlers are already here making as much hella noise as humanly possible. I guess I’m up for good and that means espresso needs to be in me now, but I’m not going down to the kitchen until I comb out this rat’s nest. Hey, some art handlers are cute!

Speaking of cute, here’s Brice Marden’s daughter, Mirabelle. She’s the girl in the brown dress. I don’t know the kid that’s macking on my sugar but she better back off! Seriously, Mirabelle, you’ve got my digits, right?



Coffee . . . .

Friday, November 28, 2008

In Which I Have My Cake and I Am Cake Too

I hate people just a little now. Shopping was fun so long as it was just me, sis and “sis” in our little girl bubble, but too many fuckers popped it. My best friend was pushed away from a display of sweaters. I mean literally pushed by some obnoxious lady. Did she apologize? No. Did she hear my friend whisper “phuck face?” We hope so. Ass.

I’m hiding in my room for now, trying to relax and bask in the glory of new shoes, a cute coat, more underwear and three new skirts I can wear for my man. He likes me in skirts (“instant access,” he says, so hot!) and anyway, I wasn’t about to buy jeans with today’s swollen tummy. Way too many thanks were given last night. Now the ‘rents are downstairs heating it all up again. It looks like we barely made a dent in the ham and the turkey is not ready to admit defeat.

I lit a candle when my playlist found Au Revoir Simone. Of course this makes me think of him.

For my birthday last month, he said he would turn me into a cake. “You only enter new decades a few times in life, so twenty is a big deal.” When I got to his place, he stripped me naked, as usual, because I’m not allowed to wear clothes around him at home. He kissed me so deep and bent me over in his hallway to fuck me (“just twenty minutes,” he promised). When I came he said, “Can you guess how many more of those I want?” “Let me guess,” I said. “Nineteen?” “No!” he spanked me. “Twenty! You need one to grow on.” He got another one straight away for that.

I was about to come again when he pulled out. “Time,” he said and grabbed my hair. I dropped to all fours (I know to do that) and he led me to his dining room. The table was cleared with a sheet under it and there were candles everywhere. There was jazz music on. It looked so romantic. He ordered me on the table, on my back. I did what he told me to do. I know to do that.

He put a blindfold on me and tied my wrists to the table legs. He put two fingers into me and got another orgasm. “That one was fast!” I giggled. “You’re a good birthday girl,” he said. His voice was so soft. He makes me melt. His hands rubbed my skin, all over my body, slowly and lightly. I smelled baby oil and sighed at its soft slickness, so warm in his hands. Maybe twenty minutes went by. I was lost in time.

Suddenly, something heavy fell on my belly. My whole body jumped. It took me a minute to catch my breath. “What was that?” I said, shocked. “Chocolate,” he said. “With chocolate frosting.” “Omigod, did you put a cake on me?” He didn’t answer me in words. He let his hands talk for him, smearing my torso with broken cake. Cake crumbled across my chest and broke over my shoulders. He rubbed it into my arms and hands to the ends of each finger. He started over at my hips, rubbing cake down my thighs, calves and feet. He put cake between my toes and ate it off. He chewed at the cake on my little breasts.

He stepped onto the table and lay on top of me. He was inside me again and I came. “Again,” he said softly and again I came for my man. He chewed at my neck and I squirmed. “Open,” he ordered. I opened my mouth and cake fell into my mouth from his. “Swallow,” he said. I swallowed and opened my mouth like a baby bird. He spit liquid cake into me. I came again. “Are you keeping track of those?” he asked. I nodded because I know to do that. “Six, Daddy. That was six.” He told me I was a good girl and then it was seven.

He got off me and was gone for a minute. I heard him return and stand above my head. “Take a deep breath and open your mouth.” I did and suddenly my mouth was filled with a heavy gush. I coughed and spat, tasting milk. He kept pouring, and so much of it! God, it spilled all over my face, went up my nose and in my hair. I coughed and realized I was laughing my ass off. “Such a happy birthday girl!” he said. He sounded so happy. I love to make my Daddy happy.

He was on me again, this time pushing back my legs to pound inside me deeper. Eight, nine, ten, eleven. I was laughing so hard I could barely count. He was laughing too. I was sure we’d fall off the table. Twelve.

He left me again. Then he was leaning over me, pressing his chest to my face. “Lick it, girl. You made a mess of me.” I licked and licked as he moved his body over my mouth. He fingered my clit while I licked. I lost count so he slapped me. “Fifteen.” I nodded and repeated. “Fifteen, Daddy. I won’t forget.” He slapped me again and spit on my lips. I licked it into my mouth.

“Now, be still, birthday girl,” he told me. I nodded and did my best to relax. I breathed deeply like he had taught me to do.

The first drip stung and burned. My clit tingled from the familiar sensation. “Oh Daddy,” I blurted. “I love you so much.” “Shh, birthday girl,” he said softly. “Daddy loves you too. But you need to be still.” I really felt like I might cry. My man was waxing me on my birthday. I knew he was making me so beautiful. Wax puddled on my belly and ran in streams between my legs. Drips fell on my chest. I was blindfolded but I could see his face in my mind. I’ve seen it so often, studying me by candlelight while he draws on me in hot wax. So many colors. He makes me so pretty.

I felt little points pressed all over my body. I heard his lighter. “There, now I’m giving you twenty-one pretty birthday candles,” he said softly. “You get one to grow on.” When the candles were all lit, he fingered me again. “You made me eighteen, Daddy.” “The last birthday before you were my girl,” he said. “Now, be still and let’s let the candles melt.”

I nodded and breathed. I was so relaxed, knowing he was close, watching over me. The candles melted into my skin, and into the wax all over me. His fingers gently removed my blindfold. “And then you were eighteen, and you came to me. Remember?” I blinked, looking up. “Forever, Daddy. I’ll remember that forever.” He smiled and bent to kiss me. He stood again and raised a hand mirror so I could watch the candles flicker. My body was a mess of chocolate, milk, wax and sweat. I was so many colors and I was on fire. “My girl is so pretty.” “You make me pretty.” He kissed me again.

“Come on, let’s clean you up.” He took a knife to my skin and gently scraped away the wax. He wiped me with a cloth. He untied me and took me be the hand, leading me to the bathroom. He carried a candle in his other hand. He filled the tub and washed me in the candlelight. He made a drink and sat talking with me while I soaked. When the water got too cold he helped me up and dried me off. He took the candle and led me to the bedroom.

He fucked me slowly and I came three more times. “Two for the birthdays we shared, and once for our next birthday,” he said. We kept making love, but he told me I couldn’t come anymore, so I didn’t.

Shopping



I'm trying on clothes all afternoon with my sister and my "real" sister, my best friend. This calls for cute panties!

As if I'll fit into anything after last night's gorge fest.

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Upstairs on Thanksgiving

It feels weird being home, knowing no one knows. I’ve got these secret bruises he gave me to get me through the holidays. They’re supposed to comfort me, but in a weird way, they just make me feel lonely. Weird, because I’ve got a huge family, and they are all downstairs. I can hear them talking. I should go down.

But first, I really need to, um, take matters in my own hands. I get wet just touching my bruises. I’ll get off thinking of his cock in my mouth, edging to my throat.

Why do I do this to myself?!

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Dirty Clothes Packed

I’m leaving for the airport. Everything is packed, mostly dirty clothes I’ll wash when I get home. Or Mom will wash them. I’ll just leave my bag in the garage on top of the washing machine. My private stuff is in my backpack, and anyway, I left anything suspicious at his place.

Mom will ask the usual nosey questions. How are your suite mates? Did you tell Julie I said hello? Was Liam sad to see you leave on break? I’ll answer honestly about my suite mates and Julie. I can even say that yeah, Liam will miss me. It’s the truth. I can leave out that he’s been missing me for months. I tried staying his girlfriend after I met my man, but I couldn’t keep it up. He was too hurt and I was too bored.

Anyway, it was too hard to hide the marks. The marks that tell me I’m his. The marks I feel under my clothes when I walk. The marks I can’t help poking and feeling when I’m alone in the shower, or in my tiny bed at night, under the covers, remembering what it’s like to be in his bed.

I’ll tell Mom the real truth about Liam. Maybe I’ll say we broke up when spring break comes, so I won’t have to explain why we’re not going someplace together. I can just be a single girl until summer, at least so far as Mom knows. After that I’ll invent some new boyfriend to tell her about.

I can’t tell her the truth. Mom, I’m seeing an older man. He makes me feel things I’ve never felt. He makes love to me all night. He ties me up. He hits me. I’m addicted to his touch. Everything in my life until now is just another stone in my pocket. I’m weighed down until I leap into him. Then, by some miracle, my body sinks but I float, my consciousness as light as a leaf in his current.